Teen Titans Tropes
by mollipwarriorchic
Summary: If you've ever read fanfiction before, you've come across a lot of gems. But it's more likely than not that you've come across very bad kinds of fics. Very very bad. The kind of bad that just becomes annoying, If they annoy you that much, this is the story for you! From Mary Sues to bad OC villians, the TItans cover them all! Rated T for safety.
1. DRAMATIC READING

Chapter 1: **DRAMATIC READING**

**A/N: **THIS CHAPTER IS TO BE READ IN YOUR MOST** IMPROBABLY EPIC, LOUD TONE OF VOICE**. HAVE A NICE DAY!

ONE DAY, ROBIN WAS WALKING AROUND THE KITCHEN. HE OPENED THE FREEZER AND SEARCHED FOR SOME PIZZA ROLLS.

"WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING FOR?" CYBORG ASKED AS HE WALKED IN, SWINGING OPEN THE MINI-FRIDGE FULL OF BEER AND SODA.

"SOME PIZZA ROLLS." ROBIN SAID IN A SOFT VOICE, STILL SEARCHING.

"OH…OKAY. GOOD LUCK WITH THAT." CYBORG CRACKED OPEN A SODA AS HE LEFT THE ROOM. EVEN WITH BEING BATMAN'S PROTÉGÉ, IT STILL TOOK HIM FIVE MINUTES FOR HIM TO REALIZE THERE WEREN'T ANY.

"DAMMIT DAMMIT DAMMIT!" ROBIN SWORE AS HE LEFT THE ROOM.

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_So...yeah. This is a crack fic. A major, major crack fic. And this will be a genuine drabble story. I promise. Ex-girl scout's honor. Review and Favorite. Grammar Nazis and Flamers welcome.  
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	2. Mary Sue

Chapter 2: Nobody Likes You Mary Sue!

"Day fifty-eight of the year two-thousand and thirteen," the Universal-Mary-Sue breathed into her tape recorder. Mary Sue had an unusual power. She could shape-shift into perfect characters! From _Ebony Dark__'__ness Dementia Raven Way _to EpicSexyHotCoolAwesomeHottiePerfectGirl, she had a wide range of talents. And she used those talents to torture all teenage superhero teams of five by stealing random members of their teams in marriage. And the team of five in this case was none other than the Titans.

"Hey dudes! There's some creepy stalker chick suction-cupped to our window." The green changeling stared at the fifteen year old girl suction-cupped to their window. Her hair was hanging down provocatively and her face was frozen in a creepy half smirk. Her eyes were bloodshot from lack of blinking.

"I'm not a creepy stalker chick! I'm-" There was a shimmer of light. It blinded half of the planet as Universal-Mary-Sue transformed in a Sailor Moon likeness. "PerfectSexyAwesomeAmazingHotEpicCoolPrettyGirl!" A new likeness overcame her. Her short, dull hair lengthened into shiny, magestical unicorn Skittle hair that blew in the wind. Her average skin turned into flawless skin, no pimples or any signs of oil. She grew about five inches, magically transforming her into the perfect model height. She lost any imperfect body traits.

"PERFECTSEXYAWESOMEAMAZINGHOTEPICPRETTYGIRL!" Beast Boy's eyes shone with love.

"Yes, it is I! But I wouldn't want to…steal you away from Raven." She flipped her hair provocatively.

"Nonsense! I never liked Raven and my heart only beats for you!" Beast Boy groveled, kneeling down on one knee and pulling out a small, velvet box.

"Oh no you don't!" They turned their heads to see Robin, the Boy Wonder, balling up his fists.

"Robin the Boy Wonder?" yelled both PERFECTSEXYAWESOMEAMAZING- and Beast Boy. Robin ran over to the pair, kneeling down next to Beast Boy.

"Oh fair maiden! Even though I only laid eyes on you a mere millisecond ago, I love you. And I want to change your last name!" And he too whipped out a velvet box from his pocket. PERFECTSEXYAWESOMEAMAZING put a hand on her forehead, her eyes rolling back in her head.

"However shall I choose?"

"Choose me!" "No me!" "He's ugly!" "Yeah; well you're green!" "That's racist you ignorant jerk!"

"BOYS!" yelled PERFECTSEXYAWESOMEAMAZING. They turned to her, love filled in their faces.

"Yes my love?" They said in unison.

"I choose-" Suddenly a black raven appeared in the room, crowing and squawking loudly.

"What are you idiots doing?" The dark empath groaned, surveying the screen.

"Proposing." Robin and Beast Boy said robotically.

"To who?" They pointed to PERFECTSEXYAWESOMEAMAZING, who was tapping her foot impatiently and crossing her arms over her chest.

"Uh, me. Now shut up so I can choose my husband." Raven scowled and shook her head. Using her mystical powers, she shortened this chapter about thirty words.

"What? No! I'm just about to choose my husband!"

"Too bad." And PERFECTSEXYAWESOMEAMAZING turned back into plain old Mary Sue, crying and gasping for breath as she was transported from this dimension.

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_I ran out of budgeting to type the whole thing. Review and Favorite. Grammar Nazis and Flamers welcome.  
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	3. Every Genderbender Fic

Chapter 3: Genderbender

"Who's idea was this?" Rob_**y**_n groaned, covering her midriff. Since she was female and in the DC Comics universe, fanfiction writers felt that she had to have a provocative costume. And they were right. She wore a tight red tunic which cut off at the middle and showed plenty of cleavage. She had a yellow cape that only went down to about the small of her back. She also wore tight green shiny spandex-which looked more like bikini bottoms-and hugged her curves and six-inch stilettos. Her long, shiny black hair curled at the bottom and had a blonde streak in it. Her plump ruby red lips looked perfectly kissable. She liked trashy romance novels, blogging, watching reality TV, and doing paperwork.

"The writers." R_**e**_ven muttered. 'Reven' meant masculinity, which is what Reven oozed. He had pale skin, a set jaw, and not even a third of the badass-ery that Raven possessed. But he made the fangirls feel less awkward for crushing on him. He wore a dark purple clock with shoulder pads and dark purple sneakers. He enjoyed bantering with _**Creature Chick**_, reading, and drink tea.

"Screw 'dem writers. They ain't got a clue what we'd really be 'ike, dat's fo sho!" _**Cyber**_ was pissed. And apparently that's how all African-American females talked when they were pissed. She had cornrows in her hair, not braids! Anyways, she had plump ruby red lips like Robyn. She was much taller than Robyn, and all of the girls. Her costume exposed her bare thighs, bare arms, and a little bit of artificial cleavage. She too was a part of the DC Comics universe, and her costume reflected such. She liked to cook, drink soda, read _good_ romance novels, watch reality TV, and sleep.

"Work on your grammar Queen Latifah." Rob_**y**_n quipped, crossing her arms across her chest. What time of the month was it? _That_ time of the month.

"Jeez, Traffic Lights; can't control your PMS?" Cyber fired back.

"Stop fighting!" A rich timbre shook the Ops. Room and all of the inhabitants. The owner of the voice was just as intimidating. Well, not really. He was usually stuck with a name like 'Starbolt' or 'FlameBolt' or something like that. But we're going to call him '_**Kor'ander**_' because the 'i' makes it feminine in a different language. Anyways, he had red hair that was about ear length. He had tan skin and small green eyes. If his appearance wasn't average, his body was completely alien (bad pun intended). His abs looked like they had taken years to work on, even though they took a few wars and ruthless training. He had huge guns that could knock people out upon first glance. His attire was purple and weren't as revealing as his female counterpart. He had a purple sleeveless shirt with a green gem near his neck. He wore pants. Not jeans, just pants. And he wore purple shoes. Just shoes.

"Hey Kor…" R_**e**_van greeted, not looking up from his novel.

"Greetings other Earthen male! Hello Earthen females!" This is seriously how he talked.

"Hey sugar. Want some bacon?" _**Cyber**_ asked, smiling at the giant redhead. _**Kor **_was just about to answer.

"Bacon. Dead pigs. You know, killing pigs is wrong. Killing animals is wrong-"

"Oh can it _**Creature Chick**_." Creature Chick was green. She was female. And she was awesome. But, sadly, she was a part of the DC comic universe, so she had to have the skimpiest outfit known to man. She had emerald green skin free of any blemish, green eyes that shone like the sun, and green hair which billowed down in tumbles. Everything about her was…green. She was vegan and eco-friendly, always lecturing her friends about the importance of taking shorter showers and stuff like that. And no matter how much they loved the environment, nobody was willing to shorter their showers to ten minutes. And while most fics named her Beast Girl or something along those lines, I'm going to call her _**Creature Chick**_ since this is original.

"Well excuse me if I love animals and don't want Earth to die!" Not only was she a master at making tofu, but she was also a master at making people guilty.

"Jeez…alright alright…now can you shut it? I'm trying to read…" grumbled R_**e**_van.

"No! I'll never-"

FLASHING RED FLASHING RED FLASHING RED! The alarm went off. Rob_**y**_n ran over to the Titans' computer.

"Ugh…Sla_**g**_e."

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_All letters bolded and italicized have been changed. Review and Favorite. Grammar Nazis and Flamers welcome. _


	4. The Absolute OOC Stew

Chapter 4: The Absolute OOC Stew

"Good morning my wonderful wonderful friends! I love you all!" screamed a female in an opera sonata voice to any empty room. She twirled around, her hood falling down. '_Wait, hood_' you scream in crazed confusion. Yes. It was Raven, our favorite dark empath. She had a giant beam on her face which could have blinded anyone. Her hands were thrown over her hair in exuberant happiness as she spun around. She was just the happiest, perkiest _rae_ of sunshine that always randomly burst into song. For the daughter of a demon, she was actually very perky.

"Ugh Can you please be quiet Raven? I'm working!" Everyone's favorite green Changeling snarled from down the hall. He was normally cooped up in his room all day, working on some paperwork and playing Xbox Live. Even though his door was shut completely and he was listening to K-Pop on his iPod, he had hearing like a bat and could always hear whenever someone was being perky. And he always squashed it.

"Shut your butt!" A high octave voice screamed. It was none other than Starfire, the moody alien. She loved to drink herbal tea and meditate as she jams out to her emo bands while watching the Bachelorette on demand. She looked like a perky girl with her tanned skin and her green eyes and her red hair, but that was only a cover-up. She was really the most sarcastic, dark, and most relatable person ever known.

"Whatever Star- dammit Robin!" There was the all too familiar laugh that erupted from the room of a certain masked bird. The door swung open and he walked out. What did Robin do you ask? Robin put a can of whipped cream under Beast Boy's seat cover. So when he sat down, whipped cream exploded

"I'm…sorry…Beast Boy…" Robin yelled between breaths. Robin was the immature one of the group. He had a very memorable laugh that they once used for pellet bombs. They hooked up his laughs to the audio chip inside of them and threw them at the villains. He was actually a jokester who loved to play jokes (obviously) and marinated in other people's comedic pain. Even though he was trained by Batman, he hadn't had the childishness beat out of him yet. But just wait…just you wait.

"You overwhelmed me." Beast Boy's door swished open as he entered the hallway (You all know what's coming next). Robin's door was across from his, so when the two testosterone filled teenagers stared at each other.

"You're overwhelmed, Cyborg's underwhelmed; why isn't anyone just whelmed?" Robin walked towards the Ops. Room.

"Oh no you're not! I'm not done scolding you!" Beast Boy yelled, running after him. He froze as he entered the Ops. Room, staring at the scene in front of him. Raven was raking a brush through an unhappy Starfire's hair.

"Do the screwing off Raven!" She hissed, wriggling away. But Raven was having none of it.

"No! Your hair is very very pretty and you never do it!" It was true. Normally Starfire just pulled it back into a high ponytail as she fought. It was a hassle-free, make-do way to do your hair.

"Let…go!" She snarled. Raven paused, her lip trembling.

"FINE!" She dropped Starfire and the tears rolled down her cheeks. But they weren't the kind of sniffling tears. They were the kind of tears that made you take deep breaths and made your lips quiver. But the thing about Raven, is that she's half demon and very emotional. So when her emotions went crazy-and they so often did- all hell broke loose. Lightbulbs exploded, paintings flew off of the walls, and the room filled with water.

"Starfire! Starfire let her brush your hair!" ordered Beast Boy, transforming into a dolphin.

"No! She rakes through and does the screwing of it up!" Starfire whined, taking deep breaths.

"UGH!" Robin called as he went under the water.

"What is going on, acquaintances?" Cyborg's robotic voice filled the room. Then came the tidal wave. And everything exploded. All because somebody decided to change the Titans' personalities.

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_Moo! I've had three bowls of ice cream! Moo! Please review! Moo! Review and Favorite. Grammar Nazis and Flamers welcome!  
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	5. Slade in Leather Pants

Chapter 5: Slade in Leather Pants

Titans Tower. Jump City, California. Year of two-thousand thirteen. The Teen Titans had never had any relationships with villains. Ever. It was a taboo that should never be violated. Ever. But one day, crap hit the fan. That's right; Pandora's box was opened. They were screwed. And it had something to do with the two females on the team. Usually their judgment was perfect. Something came over them, though. Something evil. Something sinister. And it only got worse…when Robin found out.

"What is this! What is this?" He yelled, holding up his smartphone. There, on his screen, was a selfie with Starfire, Raven, and _Slade_. Slade of all people. Raven and Starfire were duck-facing and Slade probably was too, even if his clunky mask covered his face. People of the Internet can see duck-faces from countries away.

"Ooh! Ooh! It is a picture, yes? The selfie?" Starfire bounced up and down in childish joy. Raven rolled her eyes as she relaxed into the couch, getting ready for their interrogation.

"Yes Star…I know it's a selfie. But why were you taking it with-"

"Slade?" Raven quipped. Robin nodded, scowling.

"Yes…Slade." Robin croaked.

"Well, Robin; do you not know of our relationship?" He froze. The whole world probably froze.

"R-relationship?" He slowly spat. Raven rolled her eyes again.

"Yes Robin; a relationship. It's a union that two people have." Robin pursed his lips.

"I know that, Raven. But why with Slade? Why not with me- COUGH!" He didn't say that. He said…me friend. In an Irish accent. He was a leprechaun.

"Because we love him." Robin choked on air, sputtering and gasping and falling on the ground. No amount of training could've prepared him for this.

"W-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-what? " Robin sat up, still clutching his chest.

"God Robin; don't be so immature. We love him."

"He's a villain! He aided the devil in destroying Earth for God's sakes!" Robin retorted, screaming and hissing. This was the only way he could get people to listen to him, being the 5"2 frame he was.

"It does not matter! We love him! We can change him! Who cares if he attempted destruction of Earth or tortured us for years? Everyone deserves a second chance!" Starfire screamed, tears rolling down his face.

"You _love him_?" Robin rolled out, staring at the small between the two girls.

"It's just a selfie, Robin; didn't you ever take selfies with the Joker?" Robin's face turned indignant.

"Okay first of all Instagram didn't even exist back then, so your argument is invalid!" Raven slumped back into the couch.

"But if it did, would you have?" Robin scoffed.

"Hmm…I don't think I'd have had time to ask when he kidnapped me and tortured me!" Starfire frowned.

"Well, we still love him! And we will not stop seeing him! We do not care if you kick us off of the team! We will go live with him!"

"He's a psychopath and you won't see him anymore! Not if I can help it!" Raven scowled.

"Fine! Then we're leaving!" Raven grabbed Starfire's hand and dragged her out of the room.

"Whatever! Leave! I don't care! I've got Donna and Babs!": And Robin stalked off to his room.

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_Why can I imagine Batman and The Joker taking a selfie together? I think the DC Comics Universe will hunt me down for that statement. Review and Favorite. Grammar Nazis and Flamers welcome.  
_


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